Author Archives: Jennie

Writing Workshop: Dearly Beloved Poopsie

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Dear Poopsie,

I admit it. I was a latecomer to the Koolaid. I jumped at the chance to move from a stupid phone to a smart phone, my cute little Palm Pre. I loaded it up with the communication tools that I had previously lacked and thought I was making good choices.

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I bought my Pre a cute little hot pink coat and accessories to match. I treated it well and most of the time, Pre was a good partner for me.

You were patient with me, and that’s one of the reasons I love you. Just like a mother with a child or a teacher with a student, you let me make my own mistakes and bear the consequences so that I would grow. You watched with a benevolent grin as I replaced the Palm Pre three times when the case cracked at its most vulnerable points. Poopsie, you didn’t even flinch when I paid for a new battery because even the battery had to be replaced before the two-year contract was finished. People say that actions speak louder than words, and Poopsie, your actions showed your evergreen love for me. You knew I’d come to my senses.

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You loved me from afar, safe in your orchard, while I struggled to make myself worthy of your love. But Poopsie, when it finally happened, it was a marriage made in heaven. From the first minute that I walked into the Verizon store, I knew we were meant for each other. I know you were grieving when I challenged your constancy by trying out those funny Droid phones. Sometimes a girl’s just gotta put her sweetheart in his place, after all. I’m sure that deep down inside, you were sure of my love. You knew I was just playing with you.

We’ve had a wonderful partnership. You work in my basement and you worked in Europe whenever there was available Wi-Fi. (Okay, that’s a little problem that I can’t get service in Europe. You should talk to somebody about that.) Truly, I love you. I don’t have to access my personal email on my school computer and I can get Facebook whenever I want to.

Image via buzzle.com

I love our games nights when we snuggle and play Scrabble and do crossword puzzles together. You are the phone of my dreams.

Yet, at only six months later, it worries me a little that a new guy is hanging around. I’ve been totally true to you and have praised you to everyone who will listen. I know myself, though, and I’m easily influenced by a newer model. It’s hard to believe that I could have a better partner than you, but I think there’s a reason why maxims exist.

You’ve always been honest with me. Is it true what they say about the iPad? Is bigger actually better?

Love and kisses,

Jennie

This post is linked up to Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop. Stop by and give these fabulous writers some comment love!

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Not My Ordinary Post

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I’m a garden girl, but usually I like having someone else doing the hard stuff for me. I was understandably concerned when NRB  brought these maple leaves into the kitchen.

My reputation as a “farm-ish” girl from Ohio was at stake. I was supposed to diagnose this nasty thingey on the neighbor’s maple leaves.

I’m pretty sure I’ve talked about my next door neighbor’s house that is in foreclosure and has been empty for three years after both owners died. My beloved husband (with help from the younger neighbors across the street) has been taking care of Oksana and Roman’s house during that time. It was a very welcome big deal when the city started mowing the grass in the back yard, but he still takes care of the front yard and the snow. And we have a LOT of snow in the winter here in Chicago.

We were worried about the black spot on the maple leaves, because we have both big maple trees and some new Japanese maples. Will this nasty thing kill our trees? So Mrs. Jennie went to Mr. Internet to find out. Thank goodness, there is a solution from our friends at the Purdue Pest and Plant Diagnostic Laboratory.

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Question: Almost every summer the leaves on my maple trees have black spots on them that look like tar. What is it and what should I do about it?

Answer: Tar Spot on Maple LeavesTar spot on maple is not actually “tar” on maple, but rather a fungal disease. Tar spots on maples are caused by fungi in the genusRhytisma. The most common species areRhytisma acerinumand R. punctatum.

Symptoms first appear in late spring or early summer as infected leaves develop light green or yellow-green spots. During mid to late summer, black tar-like raised structures are formed on the upper surface of leaves within the yellow spots. R. acerinum causes spots that are 0.5 to 2 cm in diameter; R. punctatum causes spots that are smaller (about 1mm in diameter). Spots caused by R. punctatum are sometimes called speckled tar spots.

Tar spot diseases seldom are detrimental to the overall health of infected trees. Tar spots may cause premature defoliation, but are not known to kill trees. Tar spot diseases are best managed by raking and destroying fallen leaves because the fungi overwinter on leaves.

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I told my husband that he has to destroy the leaves or the problem will continue, but that presents a problem in itself. We live in a suburban environment that bans burning of leaves, so we have to send them to the local yard waste collector. Unless they destroy the fungal leaves, we will have tar spot fungus next year.

It’s a conundrum. It’s not our house, it’s not our maple trees, and we’re really not supposed to be taking care of this foreclosed property. It’s actually trespassing — can you believe that?  Yet, if we don’t, the “fungus among us” will spread.

I wish the lender would just get this house on the market for a couple of dollars and relieve us all of our burden. Anyone want to buy a five bedroom, three bathroom house with an artist’s studio (that needs a little work)  in the land just beyond O’Hare? We would love to have you as a neighbor.

The Dish Room: Using Grandma’s Silver

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Silver. In my opinion, there’s no place in your house that you can’t use it. I am officially the “silver garbage collector” among my friends. When we go to a garage sale, they know that I will pick up that black piece of silver and take it home. I will rescue it from its descent into tarnish hell and use it. It will be on my next buffet setup and it will be on the patio table.

If you’ve got a surface wide enough to hold a tray, you can corral your vanity items on it. I wanted to make it easier to quickly clean my vanity countertop since it’s white Corian and it really should be wiped down every day. I grabbed one of my silver trays — you can see that it’s just as beautiful without being perfectly polished — and put all the little items on it that I had to move around when I cleaned. All I do now is move it from one side to the other and if I use my hairdryer on it every couple of days, it’s dusted, too.

It is my goal in life to never buy something when I can reuse or remix something I already have. One day, I wanted to take off my rings while I cleaned, so I went to the bar closet and found the crystal shot glass. It’s perfect, and can be an interesting conversation-starter when people want to know why I have a shot glass in the bathroom. 🙂

I’ve been looking for someone who shares my love of silver and ran across Silver Magpies. Spend some time with her posts; she’s got wonderful ideas about using silver every day.

Image via silvermagpies.com

And get out your own silver and use some of it for Thanksgiving. If you start now, you’ll easily get it polished before the turkey arrives, and then you won’t have to polish it again for at least six months!

P.S. That’s a real orchid that we took home from a benefit dinner we went to. It’s lasted three weeks, but it’s starting to fade. I’m tempted to buy another one at the grocery store because it makes me feel special every time I walk into the room.

Writers’ Workshop: My Favorite Restaurant

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I know it’s hard to believe, but my favorite restaurant while growing up was Burger Chef.

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My dad was a teacher (one of those corrupt union-card-waving, pension-grabbing, non-Social Security-receiving evil citizens who has ruined the American economy with their greed). Twice a month my dad got paid, and we went grocery shopping and had a romantic family dinner. At Burger Chef.

Despite my current frustration with the anti-teacher rhetoric — really, do you want me to take another job and let YOU take care of your fourteen-year-old monster for eight hours a day?– I respected my dad’s job. In fact, I wanted to be just like him, and most days, I try to be as good of a teacher as he was.

There was something special about not having to cook on payday Fridays. I know my mom enjoyed it and so did we. The succulent grease of the hamburger in the buttery bun was intoxicating, and the crispy French fries hot from the deep-fryer practically made my knees give way. It was a far cry from the frozen or canned peas and green beans out of our stash from the luxurious garden-fresh summer months. Every chicken we ate in the winter I had known personally. Burger Chef was a release from the drudgery of trying to feed five hungry mouths on a salary that wasn’t enough to comfortably maintain our household. I didn’t really understand how poor we were in monetary terms until I become an adult.

Image credit: Got My Reservations

Yet, we didn’t feel poor. My brothers and I shared a warm and rich family structure that allows us now as adults to remain good friends. I don’t even know if they remember Burger Chef Fridays, but for me, the foray into the world of fast food on occasion is a cherished memory of family fun.

This post is linked up to Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop. Take a little trip over there to read a few more stories, and don’t forget to give some comment love while you’re there!

11/11/11

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My “day off” begins with assessing the remaining 40 odes in my school bag for effective use of literary devices. It’s not the worst assignment I’ve ever had to grade. And yes, I know that my grading jobs are directly relatable to the assignments I give, but the ones that are the most interesting to grade are usually also the most difficult and time-consuming.

But this day’s not about me — it’s about the men and women who have, either by choice or by force, served the United States and the world.

It’s not about personal politics; I don’t believe that war is the answer, but I believe that members of our military deserve our respect.

As our students were preparing to go on their Washington D.C. trip this weekend, their agendas were different from ours. We showed them youtube videos about The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier and the HBO movie, Taking Chance. We wanted them to go to Washington, D.C. with a personal face in their hormonal brains rather than an amorphous “they” when thinking of our nation’s military. I leave you with a reading of the final journal entry by Lt. Col Michael Strobl that he wrote while escorting a young Marine home for burial. The movie itself is powerful; if you haven’t seen it, I would suggest that you do.

My father was proud to be a veteran — proud of his service to his country and happy to find a place where men could share their experiences with others who understood. Today I honor him and all those who have sacrificed for our country.

Obsession and its best friend, Pinterest

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The person who introduced me to Pinterest needs to be slapped. And you know who you are. A new and improved way to support my obsession with collecting random facts and items. It’s just about the very last thing I need to be doing with my life.

Image via allthingshendrick.blogspot.com

Yet, a part of me can’t help but wonder. Would my house and garage be the way it is if I had used Pinterest all along? Perhaps I would not have multiple years of Traditional Home and various other magazines in my office closet. Perhaps I wouldn’t have three file cabinets full of papers that I never access. Perhaps I would not have binders full of photos of table settings, flower arrangements, recipes, and decorating ideas to which I rarely refer (and I just realized that the Grammar Police Lady needs to comment on the lack of a comma in this otherwise cute graphic).

For the uninitiated among you, Pinterest is an online bulletin board. Once I installed the “Pin It” bookmark, I could “pin” a web site to my personal bulletin board. I’ve only been doing this for about two weeks, but have already had to change my titles in order to better organize the boards. I’ve been “repinned” by people who have thousands of pins on their boards. Surely this is the digital version of hoarding.

And that brings us to Christmas obsessions. My brother posted a photo on Facebook of my sister-in-law putting lighted garland on their mantel, which is alongside an already erected and lit-up Christmas tree. I was so jealous of this that I immediately decided to figure out something my husband could tolerate so that I could get started on my Christmas decorating. We didn’t decorate last year because we were out-of-town for Christmas and barely were finished with our construction, so there is quite a lot of pent-up Christmas obsession in my veins right now.

Image via Pinterest; original source unknown

I decided to use Pinterest to catalog my collection of Department 56 Christmas village houses and accessories. That was fun! Then I started looking for sites that gave ideas for displaying the houses. That was even funner! Then someone else repinned one of my pins, and I was off on a journey through her thousands of pins. It was there I found this gorgeous centerpiece.

Image via willowhouse.com

Ever since I saw The Break-Up with Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn I have always wanted a lemon centerpiece. It just sounded easy and lovely, even though Vince Vaughn’s character didn’t quite get it. Last year I bought the container from Willow House, a large vase I lovingly refer to as The Big Gulp, which is a wine-drinking reference from Courtney Cox’s television show, Cougar Town.

But I digress. Last week, while shopping at the dollar store, I saw that they had full size plastic lemons and limes for, of course, a dollar. I’ve been looking for them online, but the ones I found at obvious places like Crate and Barrel and Pottery Barn were ridiculously expensive. Today after church, armed with my Pinterest photo, I went back to the dollar store and bought eight lemons and eight limes. I know I already have fake evergreen sprays in the Christmas boxes and all I need is fake cranberries and I have my centerpiece that will last through many Christmases, even those spent in San Francisco and Seattle!

Sadly, the search for artificial cranberries has resulted in fiscal disappointment. The best ones range from seventeen to nineteen dollars for 72 little cranberries. There has to be another source. They do look pretty real, though. I’m tempted.

Image via http://www.furnituregourmet.com/aab029?gclid=CI_GjuzzoqwCFYLsKgodCDu01w

But when I look carefully at the centerpiece photo, it seems as though the red berries might be currants. Or holly. Or something that I can buy in a big sprig at Joann’s for a lot less. Lest you concern yourselves unduly, gentle readers, let it be known that I will investigate and report back. Just in case you still are with me on this story and have not given up reading the ramblings of the obsessed-with-Christmas-and-Pinterest crazy lady.

P.S. I should really categorize this as the first of my 25 Days of Christmas posts; that will save me some time later. 🙂

Writer’s Workshop: The Edge of Reason

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This post is linked up to Mama Kat’s World Famous Writer’s Workshop. Today’s prompt is to write a post in just eight lines.

Television is the edge of reason

Image via Got My Reservations

I can’t live without it and I can’t live with it

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Fake reality and realistic families

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Decorating lust and real estate wish lists

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My best friend my DVR

Image via nimblogthing.blogspot.com

I love that I can fast forward through commercials

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Tired of gratuitous swearing and violence

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I might be turning into my father.

Book Club: The Louisa Challenge

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I’ve been listening to a book in the car during my commute; so far it’s interesting but I’m not sure it’s great. It has, however, stirred me up about reading Louisa May Alcott’s body of work again. You may remember that I’m an Alcott groupie; I’ve read pretty much everything she wrote, including her journals as well as many of the biographies about her, and I’ve put a commemorative stone on her grave in Author’s Ridge in Sleepy Hollow Cemetery in Concord. Yes, I’m that person and I’m proud of it.

Image via newenglandtravelplanner.com

The Lost Summer of Louisa May Alcott (2010) is a debut novel by Kelly O’Connor McNees, who, according to her bio, lives in Chicago. Why haven’t I met her? I clearly need to get out more or read different blogs.

The Lost Summer imagines a summer romance between a local heart-throb and our beloved Louisa, who has published Flower Fables (1849) and is hopeful that she can escape the confines of her impoverished and demanding family by moving to an apartment in Boston to write and experience life. Mind you, this is early in the 1850s — she was well ahead of her time in wanting to live and work on her own in the big city, something our daughters take for granted these days.

Your challenge: read one Alcott work a month and share your thoughts. Were you brought up with Alcott as I was? Did you read her and put her aside because of her preachiness that seems out-of-place in our modern world? Are you now old enough to appreciate her? I will certainly invite Kelly O’Connor McNees to participate with us!

Given that you may not have Louisa deep in your bones, I suggest we start with a biography for the first Sunday in December. There are three seminal pieces.  Cornelia Miegs’s children’s biography, Invincible Louisa, received the Newbery Award in 1934 for the most distinguished contribution to American literature for children. It’s a classic and well worth reading. Ednah Cheney‘s Louisa May Alcott: Her Life, Letters and Journals (1888) is a contemporary look at an extraordinary woman of her time. Madeline Stern‘s seminal biography, Louisa May Alcott: A Biography (1950), brought to light parts of Alcott’s story that had not previously been told due to gender sensibilities and lack of modern scholarship on the part of the previous biographers. Stern was the foremost Alcott scholar of the 20th century; who among us will emerge as Louisa’s new partisan?

I’m hoping that you, my faithful friends, are willing to climb on the Alcott bandwagon with me. Comment or send me an email (gotmyreservations@gmail.com) regarding your participation, and read one of the biographies before January. Each is good in its own way and will get you started on your Alcott journey.

Here’s the schedule for the Louisa Challenge in the order that she wrote them; free online books can be found at The Literature Network, but your local library will probably have hard copies of most of these titles. Louisa would approve of your actually holding the treasured book in your hand. Some of them are also available from Project Gutenberg.

January:  Little Women — originally serialized as Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy followed by the second half of the story as Good Wives (1869)

February:  An Old-Fashioned Girl (1870)  — you’ll find out in this one why my name ends in “ie”

March: Little Men: Life at Plumfield with Jo’s Boys (1871)

April: Eight Cousins (1875)

May: Rose in Bloom (1876)

June: Jo’s Boys and How They Turned Out (1886)

There’s much more available to you from the Orchard House Bookstore. I have read many of these books, but not all. Challenge me to a new read! I also haven’t read or seen the movie made of  Louisa May Alcott: The Woman Behind Little Women (2009), so I’m all for finding the book and the movie and making it part of our book club.

Get your friends involved! I’m on Facebook at Got My Reservations; maybe we can even share some digital wine at our book club.

P.S. You’re welcome to read The Pilgrim’s Progress by John Bunyan, which appears frequently in Little Women, but I think I’ll pass on that one. 🙂

It’s got to be the morning after*

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And we’re back to regularly scheduled programming . . . can I please be snarky again?

Image via Got My Reservations

*With apologies to Maureen McGovern and the songwriters, Al Kasha and Joel Hirschhorn, who wrote the hauntingly beautiful love theme for The Poseidon Adventure.

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